Prize draws and competitions

Whether its summer, trying to impress a hot girl or getting ready to for a school reunion... which I am, I am always on the look out for the fast and easy health solution, fad diets I guess. So I tried the Cabbage diet!
I though it would be : "add a little cabbage to your daily diet, maybe have some on rye bread"
Wrong!
First, in this fad diet you have to like the stuff, because if you don't like cabbage ... you will definitely hate it after.
Principals of the cabbage diet or the cabbage detox is done for a period of say 7 days. 3 day cabbage detox is not enough but you wished it was finished in 2. fad diets are not as short as they shoud be.

How the cabbage detox diet works:
You have to have cabbage soup or fresh cabbage every day, you put all the nice foods you like on hold, for a week, no alcohol meats and the rest... ouch
You are entitled to accompany your cabbage soup with vegetables, not all of them and not all the fruits either, things like potatoes, bananas, beans, corn and the like are out... Out out out!
As you go through the days you can bring in more and more vegies and fruits.
By the fifth day of this cabbage soup detox plan of ours, you add a bit of meat. Chicken please, not medium rare sirloin or T-bone steak... sniffff
On the seventh day bring back some rice... what a freakin treat...

How I felt:
Blarrrggghhh, this cabbage diet detox soup thing is pretty much disgusting. I didn't like cabbage much to begin with. Bad detox advice. It is so brutal to your digestive system that I could not stop passing gas, as they say politely. In other words I farted all the time.
Side effect #1 of the cabbage detox soup thing: You walk in a cloud of fart, just like in cartoon with that rain cloud over your head. Try going to work and getting along with people!
Side effect #2 of the bad detox plan: You are hungry, it is such a change in nutrition habits, eating cabbage all the time I could have eatin a door knob.
Side effect #3 of this dumb cabbage detox: If you sweat you smell like... yes you guessed it! Like a freakin Cabbage!
Side effect #4 of the bad bad Leroy brown cabbage in your face diet?: You are so freakin starved... for real food (no matter how much soup you have) that you put the weight back on later.
Side effect#5 this is an important bad effect of this cabbage detox: You actually have a lower calorie intake, there is so much soup you can drink, that it screwed up my workouts and felt quite weak.

Has any one had similar experiences? Did you end up sweating cabbage soup too?